a concise not me monday

A confessional of things you could not have caught me doing last week. And if you could have caught me doing them, I certainly wouldn’t tell anyone about them. That would be silly, and I would leave that kind of self-humiliation to the professional bloggers, like MckMama.


I definitely did not sleep for 12 hours between 12:00am and 11:59pm on Sunday while my husband re-plumbed the entire basement.

I am not such a craig’s list adict that I did not actually both buy and sell items off of craig’s list within a 10 hour period. The net result was in the black, by the way. Or, well, would have been in the black… if that had actually happened. Which it didn’t.

I would never, ever misplace something as important as the gift list (the record of¬† ‘who gave what’) from my baby shower. This would not lead me to sitting on the floor of the nursery with all of the gifts and their cards, reproducing the list from memory (with some help from my MIL – mother-in-law) so that I could write thank you cards.

I did not forget to have lunch two days in a row. I actually have no idea how I managed to ‘not’ do this, since Nugget is particularly low tolerance of sporadic eating practices.

I did not suggest turning the car around and going home instead of going to church when it looked like we were going to be 10+ minutes late.

I did not get impatient and look up old wives’ tales and ways to induce labor online, even though we’re already headed prematurely in that direction.¬† (I promise I haven’t and won’t use any yet… but a girl can dream, right?)

We did not have chips with salsa and cheesey bean dip for two, count them, two dinners this week. We stick to a menu plan around here, darnit.

I was not (in the words of my MIL) “anal” and did not go around the nursery with my Dymo label maker,¬† labeling things.


This would not include labeling stacks of clothes in a drawer by size.


And it would not have felt really, really satisfying.

4 Responses to “a concise not me monday”

  1. Danae

    You are bordering on dangerously funny. Been thinking of you guys lately and am excited for Nugget’s birthday coming up soon!

  2. Dad

    Temporally speaking, 12:00 AM to 11:59 PM would be almost 24 hours, not 12. 12:00 PM is noon.

    And we gave you the high chair and the very informative book on proper baby handling.

  3. The Olfelts

    Thanks Dad. I intended to imply the 24 hour period between midnight Saturday and midnight Sunday. To “sleep for 12 hours between 12:00am and 11:59pm” means that of the 24 hours, I was asleep for 12 of them.

    Which was glorious, if you were wondering.


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