I can’t even say the word g-r-a-p-e-s in my own house.

Well, I can’t say that in my own house if I don’t have anything with which to back it up. (Pardon me for still ending that sentence with a preposition, but ‘up with which to back it’ just sounds pretentious.) If I were to drop the ‘g’ word and have a fridge devoid of those toddler satiating little green spheres, well, that would be the end of that. Cue full blown two year old melt down*. And so I s-p-e-l-l things so that my toddler doesn’t catch on.

I’ve also honed my euphemism skills of late. Did you catch that last one? “toddler satiating little green spheres” – anything to avoid saying g-r-a-p-e-s. DanO and I have been known to refer to the boys’ pacifiers as “the green rubber things”, and the occasional Spanish word even slips in, specifically “piyamas”.

It’s little things like this that can help make my day more enjoyable and smooth: not mentioning things that will make OBoy WANTWANTWANT NOWNOWNOW, avoiding the toys section in the store, keeping the TV remote out of sight and out of mind. And yet I still have to laugh (cry?) at myself for completely embracing the role of that mom, the one who spells the world c-o-o-k-i-e to the Target employee just in case this location doesn’t offer the free kids treats in the bakery.

Man, do I lead a glamorous life.

*unless, of course, I have some b-l-u-e-b-e-r-r-i-e-s on hand, which continue to be the trump card, even above g-r-a-p-e-s.

17 Responses to “s-p-e-l-l-i-n-g”

  1. Jennifer S.

    o this is the story of my life! now that my oldest is 5 we have to come up with code names for people, things, places b/c he is starting to figure out other names/words for people, things, places. it definitely makes my brain work overtime occasionally. thankfully, my daughter, who is 2 1/2 is a little easier…but i have no doubt it will only last a few more seconds because i’ve mentioned it. haha

    tricks & trades of being a mom – this goes in the top 10.

  2. Chetarina

    When we were little my parents read Dr. Seuss books to us, and our favorite included a character named Marvin K. Moonie (sp?). Anyways, we always thought my parents were saying “Movie” and ever since then when they were debating if they should rent a movie for us to watch, they always said “want to get a Marvin K?” To this day we still call it that when we’re all together over the holidays. LOVE IT!!

  3. Megan

    Wait until the day he can spell. It was shocking for my husband and I. I was trying to spell museum to my husband, as to avoid disappointing our daughter if he didn’t want to go. I said, “Are we still thinking about the m-u-s-e-u-m for today?” My husband, who hadn’t really been listening, stopped to try to re-spell it to himself to figure out what I’d said and my 6 year old daughter looked up from what she was eating and said, “Museum, Daddy…” ha ha ha

  4. sidnie

    Austin is so used to me spelling that now he talks to me with “spelled” words scattered in his sentences.
    His spelled words are usually something like, “p-b-r-a-s-p-r. And then he gets frustrated when I don’t know what word he spelled.

    I created a monster…

  5. annemarie

    My favourite line from A Birthday For Francis is “Alice will not have g-k-l-s and h-r-n-d.” “What are g-k-l-s and h-r-n-d?” “Cake and candy. I thought you could spell.”

  6. Laura @ Homemaking Joyfully

    The story of my life, also!!! Except, my 7 year old reads and spells, so I say “Jacob, don’t say the word I’m about to spell to dad!” It’s a bit tricky sometimes – especially when I forget to warn him and I spell a word and then he just blurts it out. Then the whole thing is ruined. We evolved into using our own abbreviations for things now, too – CFA = Chick-fil-a; PG = playground. The only word that is never allowed to be uttered in our house is BATH, otherwise, I will be required to give a bath to our almost 3 y/o dd NOW. Not in half an hour – NOW. Our special code for that is either an “agua (Spanish for water) event” or even more cryptic “the wee one needs an H2O treatment tonight”!!!

  7. Erin

    spelling never worked in my house b/c my husband can’t hear a word spelled and know what it said, so we had all kinds of code words, including “yellow monkey fruit.” Now my boys are old enough to spell so we instant message each other across the living room when we want to tell secrets . . . or we just tell them to go away. Ha!

  8. Kirsten

    i know this sounds reallly random – and i apologize. I am not a stalker. But I really really like your blog.

    I am almost 13 1/2 weeks pregnant with my 1st, I am 21 (turning 22 in December), and I have been married 14 months. I married my highschool sweetheart 2 months after graduating University….. kind of sound familiar??

    I have been researching and reading (as all 1st time pregnant women do) and I came upon your blog from thebump.com.

    Since then I have gone back and read every post since you started blogging. You have no idea how thrilled I was to happen upon a family blog from a sincere Christian woman. Blessing. blessing. blessing.

    That is all.
    I am now a dedicated follower

  9. Elizabeth

    i spell countless words throughout the day too! most recently, p-e-n-i-s, b/c it’s joshua’s latest favorite word to say (and shout… including at the store, in a song). ;)

  10. Helen Davies

    Seriously, I think you have it easy- alongside the child problem we also have a dog problem! We can’t mention w-a-l-k-i-e-s, it is referred to as the ‘w word’ or else the dog has a heart attack through excitement. ;-)

  11. Helen Davies

    PS- I am also in the process of learning Pig Latin (my hubby is fluent) to get rid of the need to spell! That is all.

  12. shelley

    We still call the zoo “the Z-O-O”, even though spelling it out has long sense served any purpose. Now it’s just our fun word for our favorite place. =)

  13. Angie

    Did I just read that Target offers free C-O-O-K-I-E-S to children? As if I didn’t love that store enought.

  14. Cris

    In our house if we want to talk about G-o-l-d-f-i-s-h, we talk about “orange aquatic creatures.” :)

  15. Emily

    My husband and I still sleep almost everything that could turn our 5 year old in tantrum if we don’t have it on hand. Our inlaws also spell things to make sure it’s okay for our son to have something…nice to know I’m not the only one that has to spell!

  16. Jen @ a little barefoot blog

    we use the initials approach most of the time. mac&cheese is M&C. Fiddlesticks are F.S. Squeeze Foods? S.F. <– we have to be careful to make the distinction with those two. Berries are Bs unless they're strawberries (S.B.s)

    and then of course there are the times when we need no words at all:
    Me to Husband: Did you get the…
    Husband: yes but they only had the…
    Me: oh. hm. well what about?
    Husband: yeah they had them, but he hasn't liked those as much lately.


Leave a Reply

  • (will not be published)

XHTML: You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>